Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Journey through Grief: Post-Op

“What happens when the immediate danger has passed, when the machines are disconnected, and the teams of doctors and nurses are gone….Surgery is when you get saved, but post op, after surgery, is when you heal, but what if you don’t…?”  Meridith Grey from Grey’s Anatomy

I seem to find the most unique statements in the most intriguing places, but often they are so relevant to what I am going through at the moment.  Grief is truly a journey and you cannot understand it until you are forced to go through.  We often think that grief is simple; with a couple of tears and a few mellow prayers it will all go away in an instant; but what if it doesn't.

After all the songs are sung, the eulogy is done, the body is in the ground, you've said your final good bye's and  the people have gone home, what do you do? When you are there in a house, filled with last Christmas' fudge and child hood memories, what do you do? How do you move on with a gaping hole in your heart?  When you've been through the pain and had the procedure, what about the post-op? What about the healing? What if you don't heal...immediately? What if?  There are so many unanswered questions to handling grief; like post op, after surgery you don't know how your body is going to react to the healing process.

In Ecclesiastes 3 it tells us that there is a time for everything.

Ecclesiastes 3 (from Biblegateway.com, New International Version)

A Time for Everything
 1 There is a time for everything,
   and a season for every activity under the heavens:  
2 a time to be born and a time to die,
   a time to plant and a time to uproot,
 3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
   a time to tear down and a time to build,
 4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
   a time to mourn and a time to dance,
 5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
   a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
 6 a time to search and a time to give up,
   a time to keep and a time to throw away,
 7 a time to tear and a time to mend,
   a time to be silent and a time to speak,
 8 a time to love and a time to hate,
   a time for war and a time for peace. 
(To read the rest of Ecclesiastes 3 follow this LINK TO ECCL. 3)

I would like to leave you with another thought provoking quote by Meredith Grey from the show Grey's Anatomy,
"The goal of any surgery is to come out better than you were before….some patients heal quickly an feel immediate relief….so the challenge after any surgery is to be patient….but if you can make it through the first weeks and months, then you can get your life back….but that’s a big if…"

The immediate danger is gone. Death has come, mourning isn't quite through yet, but it's time get your life back. Patience is the final factor to healing. Immediate healing doesn't happen for everyone, for many it takes time; So be a patient, calm down, be broken for a moment, cry about it, don't hold back the tears, but don't forget to laugh for there is peace after the storm. It's all apart of Post-Op, embrace it.

Najeema Iman, I AM Curly Locks

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