Thursday, November 8, 2012

I AM Curly Lock, The Observer

Okay so today I went to a counseling session.  No we're not crazy, nor on the verge of divorce, but we have a lot going on in our lives and could use a non-bias opinion. Of course the girls were with us, but there were plenty of toys to keep them occupied.  There was the occasional STOP, NO, DON'T DO THAT, SHARE WITH YOUR SISTER, which is common when you have a one year old and a three year old in the same space.  The session was pretty good, but I have to say that I was pretty distracted.

I love people of the older persuasion many possess wisdom that the younger generation, like myself, can benefit from.  And did I mention they are so darn cute. Our counselor was an older white gentleman, I maybe in his late 60's early 70's.  I was listening to what he was saying, but  I couldn't stop starring at the four wrinkles on his forehead and the bags that he earned under his eyes.  Don't judge me.  Wrinkles add so much character to the human face, and I was even more awestruck by how much of his face was used to articulate his points, feelings, and emotions on the topics we were discussing.  It was like a whole lifetime was painted across his face.   I am sure he earned those wrinkles, seeing as he has been married most of his adult life and the senior Pastor of several churches.

You see, I've learned through my husband, that I am a very observant person.  In fact he says  that most of the time people give me the "side eye," because I am staring at them unknowingly.  It comes in handy when I am writing fiction, or need inspiration for a poem, but to the average person it is probably considered rude.  I love observing the dynamics of human interaction, mother to daughter, husband to wife, father to son, est.  This is a new discovery, but it explains so much about why I am the way I am.  I find myself being more and more empathetic, living by the phrase, "Put yourself in someone else's shoes."  It is easy to walk by the man  with the tattered windbreaker, the woman with the uncouth hair, the child clumsily walking up the stairs, the young adult misbehaving and place judgement; but it is even harder to see past the exterior.  The man with the tattered wind breaker might just be doctor who after years of practice was forced to retire and lost his pension due to scam.  The woman with the uncouth hair may have lost her husband in Afghanistan and her mind along with it.  That child clumsily walking up the stairs may have a disability. The young adult misbehaving may be a foster child searching for guidance in the wrong way.  Your never know someones story until you walk a mile in their shoes.

I don't know if my new sense of empathy and observance has anything to do with the fact that I was blessed with a daughter with Special abilities.(You can find out more at  Or  if it is something that I was born with naturally, but I do know that I am becoming a better person for it.

Najeema Iman, I AM Curly Locks (The observer)

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